Chodron Quotes

#1. It's a transformative experience to simply pause instead of immediately fill up the space. By waiting, we begin to connect with fundamental restlessness as well as fundamental spaciousness.
-Pema Chodron, from When Things Fall Apart

Pema Chodron

#2. Pema Chodron, an ordained Buddhist nun, writes of compassion and suggests that its truest measure lies not in our service of those on the margins, but in our willingness to see ourselves in kinship with them.

Gregory J. Boyle

#3. Lean into the sharp points and fully experience them. The essence of bravery is being without self-deception. Wisdom is inherent in (understanding) emotions.

Pema Chodron

#4. Everything is material for the seed of happiness, if you look into it with inquisitiveness and curiosity. The future is completely open, and we are writing it moment to moment. There always is the potential to create an environment of blame -or one that is conducive to loving-kindness.

Pema Chodron

#5. Use your life to wake you up.

Pema Chodron

#6. If we don't look into hope and fear, seeing a thought arise, seeing the chain reaction that follows - if we don't train in sitting with that energy without getting snared by the drama, then we're always going to be afraid.

Pema Chodron

#7. It becomes increasingly clear that we won't be free of self-destructive patterns unless we develop a compassionate understanding of what they are.

Pema Chodron

#8. The Buddha taught that flexibility and openness bring strength and that running from groundlessness weakens us and brings pain. But do we understand that becoming familiar with the running away is the key? Openness doesn't come from resisting our fears but from getting to know them well

Pema Chodron

#9. Discomfort of any kind becomes the basis for practice. We breathe in knowing our pain is shared.

Pema Chodron

#10. Don't make gods into demons.

Pema Chodron

#11. While we are sitting in meditation, we are simply exploring humanity and all of creation in the form of ourselves.

Pema Chodron

#12. One piece of advice that Don Juan gave to Carlos Casteneda was to do everything as if it were the only thing in the world that mattered, while all the time knowing that it doesn't matter at all.

Pema Chodron

#13. We don't set out to save the world; we set out to wonder how other people are doing and to reflect on how our actions affect other people's hearts.

Pema Chodron

#14. Resentment, bitterness, and holding a grudge prevent us from seeing and hearing and tasting and delighting.

Pema Chodron

#15. Every time we are willing to let the story line go, and every time we are willing to let go at the end of the out-breath, that's fundamentally renunciation: learning how to let go of holding on and holding back.

Pema Chodron

#16. Just prepare well and know what you want to do. Give it your best, but you really don't have a clue what's going to happen.

Pema Chodron

#17. However, in this technique, because your eyes are open and because the gaze in not a tight gaze and because the whole emphasis of the practice is one of openess, even though you're mindful of the out-breath, you're not shutting out all other things that are going on.

Pema Chodron

#18. Meditation is not about getting out of ourselves or achieving something better. It is about getting in touch with what you already are.

Pema Chodron

#19. when we sit with discomfort without trying to fix it, when we stay present to the pain of disapproval or betrayal and let it soften us, these are the times that we connect with bodhichitta. Tapping

Pema Chodron

#20. At the root of all the harm we cause is ignorance.

Pema Chodron

#21. The difference between what is neurosis and what is wisdom is very hard to perceive, because somehow the energy underlying both of them is the same.

Pema Chodron

#22. Generosity is an activity that loosens us up. By offering whatever we can - a dollar, a flower, a word of encouragement - we are training in letting go.

Pema Chodron

#23. The most heartbreaking thing of all is how we cheat ourselves of the present moment.

Pema Chodron

#24. We have two alternatives: either we question our beliefs - or we don't. Either we accept our fixed versions of reality- or we begin to challenge them. In Buddha's opinion, to train in staying open and curious - to train in dissolving our assumptions and beliefs - is the best use of our human lives.

Pema Chodron

#25. Meditation is a totally nonviolent, nonaggressive occupation.

Pema Chodron

#26. You're never going to get your act together, fully, completely.

Pema Chodron

#27. This book stresses repeatedly that it is unconditional compassion for ourselves that leads naturally to unconditional compassion for others.

Pema Chodron

#28. Until we stop clinging to the concept of good and evil, the world will continue to manifest as friendly goddesses and harmful demons.

Pema Chodron

#29. We have a choice. We can spend our whole life suffering because we can't relax with how things really are, or we can relax and embrace the open-endedness of the human situation, which is fresh, unfixated, unbiased.

Pema Chodron

#30. One of the deepest habitual patterns that we have is to feel that now is not enough.

Pema Chodron

#31. It's even difficult to hear that what we reject out there is what we reject in ourselves, and what we reject in ourselves is what we are going to reject out there.

Pema Chodron

#32. We are undoing a pattern ... It's the human pattern: we project onto the world a zillion possibilities of attaining resolution.

Pema Chodron

#33. Birth is painful and delightful. Death is painful and delightful. Everything that ends is also the beginning of something else. Pain is not a punishment; pleasure is not a reward. Inspiration

Pema Chodron

#34. But in this meditation technique, we are with the out-breath; there's no particular instruction about what to do until the next out-breath.

Pema Chodron

#35. We're all in this together, all so interconnected that we can't awaken without one another. We

Pema Chodron

#36. Openness doesn't come from resisting our fears but rather from getting to know them well.

Pema Chodron

#37. Being fully present isn't something that happens once and then you have achieved it; it's being awake to the ebb and flow and movement and creation of life, being alive to the process of life itself.

Pema Chodron

#38. Patience has nothing to do with suppression. In fact, it has everything to do with a gentle, honest relationship with yourself.

Pema Chodron

#39. Allow situations in your life to become your teacher.

Pema Chodron

#40. One of the main discoveries of meditation is seeing how we continually run away from the present moment, how we avoid being here just as we are.

Pema Chodron

#41. Wholeheartedly do what it takes to awaken your clear-seeing intelligence, but one day at a time, one moment at a time. If we live that way, we will benefit this earth.

Pema Chodron

#42. The more you're willing to open your heart, the more challenges come along that make you want to shut it.

Pema Chodron

#43. Obstacles are our friends: they teach us where we're stuck.

Pema Chodron

#44. Treat yourself as your own beloved child.

Pema Chodron

#45. Constantly apply cheerfulness, if for no other reason than because you are on this spiritual path. Have a sense of gratitude to everything, even difficult emotions, because of their potential to wake you up.

Pema Chodron

#46. All ego really is, is our opinions, which we take to be solid, real, and the absolute truth about how things are.

Pema Chodron

#47. So the next time you encounter fear, consider yourself lucky. This is where the courage comes in. Usually we think that brave people have no fear. The truth is that they are intimate with fear.

Pema Chodron

#48. All the terrible things we do to ourselves and others from alcoholism to character assignation to abuse to murder come from one cause: the inability to stay present with an uncomfortable feeling in the body and seek short-term relief.

Pema Chodron

#49. If we knew that tonight we were going to go blind, we would take a long, last real look at every blade of grass, every cloud formation, every speck of dust, every rainbow, raindrop-everything.

Pema Chodron

#50. Peace between countries must rest on the solid foundation of love between individuals. - MAHATMA GANDHI

Pema Chodron

#51. MY teacher Trungpa Rinpoche encouraged us to lead our lives as an experiment, a suggestion that has been very important to me.

Pema Chodron

#52. The more you just try to get it your way, the less you feel at home.

Pema Chodron

#53. We can drop the fundamental hope that there is a better "me" who one day will emerge. We can't just jump over ourselves as if we were not there.

Pema Chodron

#54. In any case, the point is not to try to get rid of thoughts, but rather to see their true nature. Thoughts will run us around in circles if we buy into them, but really they are like dream images. They are like an illusion - not really all that solid. They are, as we say, just thinking.

Pema Chodron

#55. Sitting meditation gives us a way to move closer to our thoughts and emotions and to get in touch with our bodies.

Pema Chodron

#56. The trick is to keep exploring and not bail out, even when we find out that something is not what we thought.

Pema Chodron

#57. Compassion practice is daring. It involves learning to relax and allow ourselves to move gently toward what scares us. The trick to doing this is to stay with emotional distress without tightening into aversion, to let fear soften us rather than harden into resistance.

Pema Chodron

#58. It's very helpful to realize that being here, sitting in meditation, doing simple everyday things like working, walking outside, talking with people, bathing, using the toilet, and eating, is actually all that we need to be fully awake, fully alive, fully human.

Pema Chodron

#59. Self-improvement can have temporary results, but lasting transformation occurs only when we honor ourselves as the source of wisdom and compassion.

Pema Chodron

#60. there's more to liberation than trying to avoid discomfort, more to lasting happiness than pursuing temporary pleasures, temporary relief.

Pema Chodron

#61. As Buddhism moved to the West, one of the big characteristics was the strong place of women. That didn't exist in the countries of origin. It's just a sign of our culture.

Pema Chodron

#62. Sometimes we find that we like our thoughts so much that we don't want to let them go.

Pema Chodron

#63. Each time you stay present with fear and uncertainty, you're letting go of a habitual way of finding security and comfort.

Pema Chodron

#64. We could say that the word mindfulness is pointing to being one with our experience, not dissociating, being right there when our hand touches the doorknob or the telephone rings or feelings of all kinds arise. The

Pema Chodron

#65. We are not given any promises that, because of our noble intentions, everything will be okay. We learn that what truly heals is gratitude and tenderness. We [need] to transform our minds and actions for the sake of other people and for the future of the world.

Pema Chodron

#66. Meditation helps you to meet your edge; it's where you actually come up against it and you start to lose it.

Pema Chodron

#67. Every moment is unique, unknown, completely fresh.

Pema Chodron

#68. Don't worry about achieving. Don't worry about perfection. Just be there each moment as best you can. When you realize you've wandered off again, simply very lightly acknowledge that. This light touch is the golden key to reuniting with our openness.

Pema Chodron

#69. By becoming intimate with how we close down and how we open up, we awaken our unlimited potential.

Pema Chodron

#70. Whatever happens in your life, joyful or painful, do not be swept away by reactivity. Be patient with yourself and don't lose your sense of perspective.

Pema Chodron

#71. When thoughts come up, touch them very lightly, like a feather touching a bubble. Let the whole thing be soft and gentle, but at the same time precise.

Pema Chodron

#72. How will we experience the world a month, a year, or five years from now? Will we be even angrier, more grasping and fearful, or will some shift have occurred? This depends entirely on the tendencies we reinforce today.

Pema Chodron

#73. Once we have the fixed idea "this is me," then we see everything as a threat or a promise - or something we couldn't care less about.

Pema Chodron

#74. I equate ego with trying to figure everything out instead of going with the flow. That closes your heart and your mind to the person or situation that's right in front of you, and you miss so much.

Pema Chodron

#75. In truth, there is enormous space in which to live our everyday lives.

Pema Chodron

#76. It's important to remember, when we're out there aggressively working for reform, that, even if our particular issue doesn't get resolved, we are adding peace to the world. We have to do our best and at the same time give up all hope of fruition.

Pema Chodron

#77. It's not a terrible thing that we feel fear when faced with the unknown. It is part of being alive, something we all share.

Pema Chodron

#78. There are many changes in the weather of a day.

Pema Chodron

#79. Opting for coziness, having that as your prime reason for existing, becomes a continual obstacle to taking a leap and doing something new, doing something unusual, like going as a stranger into a strange land.

Pema Chodron

#80. What we call obstacles are really the way the world and our entire experience teach us where we're stuck.

Pema Chodron

#81. At some point, we realize that what we do for ourselves benefits others, and what we do for others benefits us.

Pema Chodron

#82. Even if you don't feel appreciation, just look. Feel what you feel; take an interest and be curious.

Pema Chodron

#83. If it's painful, you become willing not just to endure it but also to let it awaken your heart and soften you. You learn to embrace it.

Pema Chodron

#84. Let your curiosity be greater than your fear.

Pema Chodron

#85. Rejoicing in the good fortune of others is a practice that can help us when we feel emotionally shut down and unable to connect with others. Rejoicing generates good will.

Pema Chodron

#86. It helps to remember that our spiritual practice is not about accomplishing anything - not about winning or losing - but about ceasing to struggle and relaxing as it is.

Pema Chodron

#87. Compassion involves learning to relax and allow ourselves to move gently toward what scares us.

Pema Chodron

#88. Inner # peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your # emotions

Pema Chodron

#89. Maybe the most important teaching is to lighten up and relax. It's such a huge help in working with our crazy mixed-up minds to remember that what we're doing is unlocking a softness that is in us and letting it spread. We're letting it blur the sharp corners of self-criticism and complaint.

Pema Chodron

#90. In sitting meditation, our practice is to watch our thoughts arise, label them "thinking", and return to the breath.

Pema Chodron

#91. Only in an open, nonjudgmental space can we acknowledge what we are feeling. Only in an open space where we're not all caught up in our own version of reality can we see and hear and feel who others really are, which allows us to be with them and communicate with them properly.

Pema Chodron

#92. When you open the door and invite in all sentient beings as your guests, you have to drop your agenda.

Pema Chodron

#93. A warrior accepts that we can never know what will happen to us next.

Pema Chodron

#94. The everyday practice is simply to develop a complete acceptance and openness to all situations and emotions, and to all people, experiencing everything totally without mental reservations and blockages, so that one never withdraws or centralizes into oneself.

Pema Chodron

#95. As the twelfth-century Tibetian yogi Milarepa said when he heard of his student Gampopa's peak experiences, 'They are neither good nor bad. Keep meditating.'

Pema Chodron

#96. If you see a homeless person on the street, and they need food, housing, medical attention - if you can give that, do it. But at the same time, work with tonglen, because that is how you start dissolving the barrier between you and them.

Pema Chodron

#97. If someone comes along and shoots an arrow into your heart, it's fruitless to stand there and yell at the person. It would be much better to turn your attention to the fact that there's an arrow in your heart ...

Pema Chodron

#98. Meditation is about seeing clearly the body that we have, the mind that we have, the domestic situation that we have, the job that we have, and the people who are in our lives.

Pema Chodron

#99. I have all the support I need to simply relax and be with the transitional, in-process quality of my life. I have all I need to engage in the process of awakening.

Pema Chodron

#100. But the instruction that the awareness is only twenty-five percent really brings home the idea that it's not a concentration practice - there's a very light touch on the berath as it goes out.

Pema Chodron