Butcher'd Quotes

#1. You're in America now," I said. "Our idea of diplomacy is showing up with a gun in one hand and a sandwich in the other and asking which you'd prefer. - Author: Jim Butcher

#2. But I'd never been very good at expressing myself verbally. - Author: Jim Butcher

#3. Mortimer Lindquist seemed to have finally given in to the inevitable. I'd seen him with a bad toupee, and with an even worse comb-over, but this was the first time I'd seen him sporting a full-on Charles Xavier. - Author: Jim Butcher

#4. He'd died a hero. It seemed so empty to me, at that moment. Meaningless to be a hero. - Author: Jim Butcher

#5. Maybe they'd use biological or chemical weapons instead. Maybe they'd crash the world economy. Maybe they'd turn every program on television into one of those reality shows."
"That's mostly done already, Harry."
"Oh. Well. I've got to believe that the world is worth saving anyway. - Author: Jim Butcher

#6. Bob, would you be willing to take on Evil Bob?"
Bob's eyes darted nervously. "I'd ... prefer not to. I'd really, really prefer not to. You have no idea. That me was crazy. And buff. He worked out. - Author: Jim Butcher

#7. If I'd realized how rabid he was to catch me slipping, I wouldn't have added more fuel to his fire by hitting him in the mouth.
Okay. I probably still would have hit him in the mouth. But I wouldn't have done it quite so hard. - Author: Jim Butcher

#8. Mac folded his arms on the bar and looked at me intently and said, in a resonant baritone, "You've got to be very careful, Harry."
I looked at him, shocked. He'd ... used grammar. - Author: Jim Butcher

#9. I've gotten into two fights since I've begun studying the martial arts, and each time, I was worried I'd kill the guy. One of my teachers always told me I had good power but bad control. - Author: Jim Butcher

#10. There was a sound like a human yawn, and then the skull turned slightly toward me and asked, "What's up, boss?"
"Evil's afoot."
"Well, sure," Bob said, "because it refuses to learn the metric system. Otherwise it'd be up to a meter by now. - Author: Jim Butcher

#11. The curve of her smile promised things that were probably illegal, and bad for you, and would carry warnings from the Surgeon General, but that you'd still want to do over and over again. - Author: Jim Butcher

#12. Sweeping from butcher's stalls, dung, guts, and blood,
Drown'd puppies, stinking sprats, all drench'd in mud,
Dead cats, and turnip-tops, come tumbling down the flood. - Author: Jonathan Swift

#13. If he stayed close enough to Maggie for long enough, the dog might wind up with more education than me. Then there'd be no talking to him. - Author: Jim Butcher

#14. I'm the third or fourth generation of actor in my family; I'm sure if they were butchers, I'd be a butcher, too. - Author: Sean Pertwee

#15. it would be a real pity to die when I'd finally put tabs on who had gotten me into this mess - - Author: Jim Butcher

#16. Of course Evil's afoot. If it had switched to the metric system it'd be up to a meter by now. - Author: Jim Butcher

#17. Don't take a butcher's advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he'd be a chef. - Author: Andy Rooney

#18. I hadn't realized, until I actually heard his voice, how much I'd missed the demented little perv. - Author: Jim Butcher

#19. I'd had a key to the marina's locks at one time, but I'd lost track of it when I got shot, drowned, died, got revived into a coma, haunted my friends for a while, and then woke up in Mab's bed.
(My life. Hell's bells.) - Author: Jim Butcher

#20. I mean, go figure. You prepare your home for an assault and you don't take zombies into consideration. I'd fallen victim to one of the other classic blunders, along with not getting involved in a land war in Asia and never going in against a Sicilian when death was on the line. - Author: Jim Butcher

#21. Books were expensive, as well. But she'd read enough of them to know that they were only as valuable as the contents of their writers' minds - and to her it seemed that a great many writers, had they been merchants, would have precious little inventory. - Author: Jim Butcher

#22. I said to them last week that I'd like them to win ugly and they certainly won ugly today. That was the ugliest thing I've seen since the ugly sisters fell out of the ugly tree. - Author: Terry Butcher

#23. I was seducing shepherdesses when you weren't a twinkle in your great-grandcestor's eyes. I think I know what I'm doing. - Author: Jim Butcher

#24. Thomas came last, buckling on his gun belt, which was currently hung with his ridiculously huge Desert Eagle, just in case we were attacked by a rabid Cape buffalo. - Author: Jim Butcher

#25. Rowl was not prepared to tolerate incompetence where his personal human was concerned. He had just gotten her properly trained. - Author: Jim Butcher

#26. You and I, in our quest for truth, must set ourselves on a higher level. If the worldly reasoner
is like a butcher, we wish not to be found like them - minus fingers or thumbs. Spiritual reasoning
can be a very sharp blade; it behooves us, then, to 'rightly divide'. - Author: D.L. Herring

#27. I'd hate to find out that the universe really wasn't conspiring against me. It would jerk the rug out from under my persecution complex. - Author: Jim Butcher

#28. this miserable creature, this once evil bureaucratic butcher - Author: D. Lawrence-Young

#29. I'd been in hairier situations than this one. Actually, it's sort of depressing, thinking how many times I'd been in them. But if experience had taught me anything, it was this: No matter how screwed up things are, they can get a whole lot worse. - Author: Jim Butcher

#30. Her flawless pale skin was also spangled with gemstones. I don't know how they'd been attached, but they clung to her and sent little flashes of color glittering around the cavern when she moved. They were concentrated most densely around her ... well ... She'd been, ah, vajazzled. - Author: Jim Butcher

#31. I'd gone with my usual option. I was running through long tunnels filled with demons and monsters and nightmares, because it was easier than going to the gym. - Author: Jim Butcher

#32. I'm not a doctor," Butters said.
We'd done this dance several times. "You are the Mighty Butters," I said. "You can do anything. - Author: Jim Butcher

#33. None of us had known the layout to Marcone's place, so we'd chosen to approach from the rear, on general principles of sneakiness. - Author: Jim Butcher

#34. Santa is a much bigger and more powerful faery than Toot, and I don't know his true name anyway. You'd never see me trying to nab Saint Nick in a magic circle even if I did. I don't think anyone has stones that big. - Author: Jim Butcher

#35. Love you. That should have been simple enough to say. But the words stuck hard in my throat. I'd never said them to anyone I didn't lose, - Author: Jim Butcher

#36. So really, it was just as well that Godmother had caught up to me, in spite of my best efforts to avoid her. I'd hate to find out that the universe really wasn't conspiring against me. It would jerk the rug out from under my persecution complex. -Harry - Author: Jim Butcher

#37. It's a tradition," Grimm said. "Were traditions rational, they'd be procedures. - Author: Jim Butcher

#38. I'd made the vampire cry. Great. I felt like a real superhero. Harry Dresden, breaker of monsters' hearts. - Author: Jim Butcher

#39. My God, there are times when the sexiest thing a woman can give a man is permission. - Author: Jim Butcher

#40. Somewhere out there was a village I'd deprived of it's idiot. - Author: Jim Butcher

#41. If you had said before the game we would get three points, I would have said you'd had too much gin. - Author: Terry Butcher

#42. You'd think as long as I was gambling with my soul, I would have thought to get Mab to throw in fifty bucks an hour plus expenses. - Author: Jim Butcher

#43. That woman," Grimm said quietly, "drives me quite insane."
Kettle grunted. "Why'd you marry her, then? - Author: Jim Butcher

#44. It bothered me that he was right. Without Sir Stuart's intervention, I'd have been dead again already.
That's right
you heard me: dead again already.
I mean, come on. How screwed up is your life (after- or otherwise) when you find yourself needing phrases like that? - Author: Jim Butcher

#45. Arakawa: I'd follow three simple rules: 1) Never go within two kilometres of circus freaks. 2) Never go near the butcher shop in Dublith. 3) Always spend under 300 sen on snacks. That ought to keep me alive! - Author: Hiromu Arakawa

#46. Same result, only I'd be steam-cooked instead of roasted. - Author: Jim Butcher

#47. Butters blinked at looked at Thomas. "My God," he said. "You've been shot."
Thomas hooked a thumb at Butters. "Check out Dr. Marcus Welby, MD, here."
"I'd have gone with Doogie Howser, maybe," I said.
"Split the difference at McCoy?" Thomas asked.
"Perfect. - Author: Jim Butcher

#48. There are some basic tenets that ninety-nine percent of all Wiccans follow, but at its core the faith is all about individual freedom. Wiccans believe that as long as you aren't hurting anyone else by doing it, you should be free to act and worship in whatever way you'd like. - Author: Jim Butcher

#49. My father was in the kitchen putting a new washer in the kitchen faucet. He looked relieved to see Morelli standing in the hallway. He'd probably prefer I bring home someone useful, like a butcher or a car mechanic, but I guess cops are a step up from undertakers. - Author: Janet Evanovich

#50. She'd grown up in a strict household; she'd gone insane with freedom the minute she ran away and got out on her own. - Author: Jim Butcher

#51. Inari screamed and swung her stake, but her Buffy impersonation wasn't any better than mine. - Author: Jim Butcher

#52. Go back," he said.
"Can't. Stand aside?"
"Can't."
"So it's like that?" I said.
Fix exhaled. Then he nodded. "Yeah."
And for the first time in a decade the Winter Knight and Summer Knight went to war. - Author: Jim Butcher

#53. When crossed with Yorkshire, Hampshire, or Chester White females, the Duroc breed can create some top-rung F1 females for producing butcher stock and show pigs. - Author: Kelly Klober

#54. I don't believe in faeries! - Author: Jim Butcher

#55. Questioning the status quo can result in banishment, imprisonment, ridicule or being burned at the stake, depending on your era, your locale, and the sacred cows you wish to butcher. - Author: Gene Spafford

#56. He had no frame of reference, and couldn't read - most faeries were studiously averse to print. - Author: Jim Butcher

#57. Love is patient. Love is kind. Love always forgives, trusts, supports, and endures. Love never fails. When every star in the heavens grows cold, and when silence lies once more on the face of the deep, three things will endure: faith, hope, and love. - Author: Jim Butcher

#58. Smiling always seems to annoy people more than actually insulting them. Or maybe I just have an annoying smile. - Author: Jim Butcher

#59. Brooke?" he finally found the sense to ask. "What are you doing here?"
"I need a gun."
This was not how his dream was supposed to go. - Author: Shannon K. Butcher

#60. There are old swordsmen and bold swordsmen. But few old, bold swordsmen. - Author: Jim Butcher

#61. Love, that is all I asked, a little love, daily, twice daily, fifty years of twice daily love like a Paris horse-butcher's regular, what normal woman wants affection? - Author: Samuel Beckett

#62. If you own a butcher shop, don't hire vegetarians. To hire the right people, you have to let the wrong people go. - Author: Robert Kiyosaki

#63. You cannot find one single verse in the New Testament that calls for violence against non-believers. Jesus said to love your enemies. Muhammad said to butcher your enemies. - Author: Robert Jeffress

#64. Not gonna bind ya or break ya, old spirit. Just gonna kick your ass up between your ears. - Author: Jim Butcher

#65. You walk through the door and everything goes to hell." "That's embroidered on my towels, actually. - Author: Jim Butcher

#66. Things began to come together, and I went from speaking like an evil baby to speaking like a hillbilly. "Is thems the thoughts of cows?" I'd ask the butcher, pointing to the calves' brains displayed in the front window. - Author: David Sedaris

#67. bullies either. He'd be glad to have - Author: Jim Butcher

#68. I am blind and limited. I would be a fool think myself wise. And so, not knowing what the universe means, I can only try to be responsible with the knowledge, the strength, and the time given to me. I must be true to my heart. - Author: Jim Butcher

#69. The butcher, baker, and candlestick maker have been around a lot longer than supermarkets and Wal-Mart. - Author: Joel Salatin

#70. He gave me a severe look over his spectacles and said, as if he thought the words were deadly venom and might kill me, You are an untidy person. - Author: Jim Butcher

#71. Ebenezar blinked . Then he turned his face to me his expression clearly asking whether or not I was out of my damned mind .

"Wile E. Coyote" I said to him soberly . "Suuuuuuper Genius - Author: Jim Butcher

#72. It rained toads the day the White Council came to town. - Author: Jim Butcher

#73. Give it to 'em!" Take 'em down!" First Aleran!" Kick their furry
" Assault formation! - Author: Jim Butcher

#74. If your opponent has you by fifty pounds, winning a fight against him is a dubious proposition, at best. If your opponent has you by eight thousand and fifty pounds, you've left the realm of combat and enrolled yourself in Road-kill 101. Or possibly in a Tom and Jerry cartoon. - Author: Jim Butcher

#75. I've had sex that didn't feel as good as Maeve's smile. - Author: Jim Butcher

#76. Injun Joe studied the body for a moment, his eyes sad. Then he said, "I'd rather go in my sleep, I think." He glanced back at me. "What about you?"
"I want to be stepped on by an elephant while having sex with identical triplet cheerleaders," I said. - Author: Jim Butcher

#77. Chocolate fends off all kinds of nasty stuff. And if you get hungry while warding off evil, you have a snack. It's multipurpose equipment. - Author: Jim Butcher

#78. The vampire's true appearance was grotesque
but it wasn't as bad as some of the things I had seen in my day. Some demons were a lot worse, and some of the Elder Things could rip your mind apart just by letting you look at them - Author: Jim Butcher

#79. Bikers don't wear all that leather around simply for the fashion value or possible felony assaults. It's handy for keeping the highway from ripping the skin from your flesh should you wind up losing control of the bike and sliding along the asphalt for a while. - Author: Jim Butcher

#80. This is ridiculous. I look like the Games Workshop version of a Jedi Knight. - Author: Jim Butcher

#81. A gun is not a weapon! It's a tool, like a butcher's knife, or a harpoon, or an alligator. - Author: Homer

#82. Well, you know ... I grew up in postwar Britain, when you were lucky to get anything to eat. People in America have absolutely no conception of how austere England was after the war. While you were all sort of eating butter and eggs, we were eating rabbit. That's what there was in the butcher shop. - Author: Tim Curry

#83. I was staring into a mirror, and I didn't like what I saw there. - Author: Jim Butcher

#84. Things were weird enough without needing to ride around in a van with a bunch of naked, somewhat geeky college students. - Author: Jim Butcher

#85. I love being a wizard. Every day is like Disneyland. - Author: Jim Butcher

#86. With other women he had not been able to touch their flesh without experiencing the desire to devour it, as though ravenous with an abominable hunger to butcher them. But this one, could he then love her, and not kill her? - Author: Emile Zola

#87. Personal sacrifices are really the beginning and the end of everything, because you don't win because you do one thing right or two things right. You win because you do 1,000 little things right throughout the year. - Author: Susan Butcher

#88. I checked my gear, my pockets, my shoelaces, and realized that I had crossed the line between making sure I was ready and trying to postpone the inevitable. - Author: Jim Butcher

#89. Ragweed,wild oat,vetch,butcher grass,invaginate volunteer beans,all heads gently nodding in a morning breeze like a mother's soft hand on your cheek ... - Author: David Foster Wallace

#90. It doesn't make you a monster to want, she said, her voice very gentle. It's what you do with it that matters. - Author: Jim Butcher

#91. Hope is a force of nature. Don't let anyone tell you different. - Author: Jim Butcher

#92. A succubus on the set. Strike that, the health-conscious kid sister made it two ... succubuses. Succubusees? Succubi? Stupid Latin correspondence course. - Author: Jim Butcher

#93. Well, death says, as he walks by, I'm going to get you anyhow no matter what you've been: writer, cab-driver, pimp, butcher, sky-diver, I'm going to get you - Author: Charles Bukowski

#94. I hurled my fear and my loneliness, my love and my respect, my rage and my pain. I made of my thoughts a hammer, infused with the fires of creation and tempered in the icy power of the darkest guardian the earth had ever known. - Author: Jim Butcher

#95. Just remember that you're on my list, Marcone. Soon as I get done with all the other evils in this town, you won't be the lesser of them anymore."
Marcone stared at me with half-lidded eyes and said, "Eek. - Author: Jim Butcher

#96. What is that in his hand?"
"A cleaver. As in-"
"Butcher's knife."
"You got it."
"I hope not."
"He does not look happy."
"Are you sure it's a he?"
"I don't want to know. - Author: Ridley Pearson

#97. Like a butcher without a knife, a knight without a sword, and a farrier without a hammer, you cannot have a town without rules; if there were a town like that, a great big anarchy would reign there, just as in the realm of animals! - Author: Mehmet Murat Ildan

#98. I think that men ought to treat women like something other than weaker men with breasts. - Author: Jim Butcher

#99. I felt like a collection of complaints and malfunctions. - Author: Jim Butcher

#100. You are the Worst Kind of Animal. A Butcher by Day and a Pussy Cat by Night. - Author: Monroe Ariel