Top 100 Abuse Healing Quotes
#1. Often it isn't the initiating trauma that creates seemingly insurmountable pain, but the lack of support after.
S. Kelley Harrell
#2. Being joyous or happy is not something you should feel guilty about.
Stephen Richards
#3. Offer yourself forgiveness as a gift. The word 'give' is the basic keyword in the word forgiveness, therefore it relays a meaning therein.
Stephen Richards
#4. This book is dedicated to all who have been affected by sexual violence.
Robert Uttaro
#5. Often times, people don't realize how much their childhood still affects them when they are an adult. Or other people don't realize the affect things still have on those they know. Other people might even say, "Get over it" or "Move on." But it's usually simply not that easy.
Lisa Bedrick
#6. If you have been raped or sexually assaulted and you have been blamed, or fear that you may be blamed, I just want you to understand this: You are not to blame. There is nothing you did to make someone hurt you, nor is there anything you could have done differently to prevent or stop it.
Robert Uttaro
#7. The moment we become forgivers, then we are in line to enjoy the benefits of forgiveness.
Stephen Richards
#8. The most basic method one can use to let go of the past is by looking at it as a learning experience.
Stephen Richards
#9. Fearing the unknown within myself has kept me crouching in a corner. I look to see who I am and discover much that is worthy.
Maureen Brady
#10. Due to the need to co-exist with these inhuman and inconsiderate people, we will obviously be disturbed by their acts; something which if we look at closely actually means that we too could be affecting some other people negatively every once in a while.
Stephen Richards
#12. Overly playing the role of the victim can debar you from accepting responsibility for your actions and emotions.
Stephen Richards
#14. Just because you have been through a bad experience does not give you the ticket to keep going back to that situation over and over again and dramatizing it out of proportion.
Stephen Richards
#15. Forgiveness is not simply a single act, it is a full process.
Stephen Richards
#16. You are not, though, forgiving so as to let others off with things. You are forgiving so that you can empower yourself to get over it and become strong.
Stephen Richards
#17. The idea of forgiveness is a journey that requires patience. If the journey of forgiveness is well travelled, there is a chance that we are bound to change in a very helpful way.
Stephen Richards
#18. He doesn't hurt us anymore."
Of course he doesn't hurt you anymore, I think. You're not defenseless anymore.
Melanie O'Shea
#19. We are often so convinced that we are so hurt and in pain, so much so that we opt not to forgive. Yet, as a consequence, that is what will make you weak!
Stephen Richards
#20. Recovery unfolds in three stages. The central task of the first stage is the establishment of safety. The central task of the second stage is remembrance and mourning. The central focus of the third stage is reconnection with ordinary life.
Judith Lewis Herman
#21. Scars prove that you're still here. That you can move on. Maybe missing a chunk of yourself, but here, goddamn it, surviving.
Ash Parsons
#22. Pain can cause us to learn no end of lessons, but without resolution there can be no healing!
Stephen Richards
#23. I am building a healthy support system and learning to use it readily.
Maureen Brady
#24. By understanding the basic impediments to forgiveness, the repercussions of failing to forgive and the fruits of forgiveness, this will lead you gently to the shoreline of a distinct new and more powerful YOU.
Stephen Richards
#25. The purpose of the false self is to defend against pain - not deal with reality
Robert W. Firestone
#26. Your forgiveness or failure to forgive simply takes you nearer or further away from your ultimate goal. There are no two ways to deal with it, there is only one.
Stephen Richards
#27. Abuse really is its own alphabet. Those who have not gone through it cannot understand it fully. The echos of violence hang in subconscious long after the threat is gone.
Michelle Franklin
#28. A quick turn around a corner
and my planet becomes sand
on the shore of a dying Universe
S. Kelley Harrell
#29. We invent what we need to get us by, but in doing so we are really continuing to hold on to the pain of yesterday.
Stephen Richards
#30. As part of the healing process, change your perception of yourself from "victim" to that of "advocate" and "survivor.
Don Easton
#31. But no matter how much evil I see, I think it's important for everyone to understand that there is much more light than darkness.
Robert Uttaro
#32. Recovery can take place only within then context of relationships; it cannot occur in isolation.
Judith Lewis Herman
#33. Never let kindness be your weakness, never let your weaknesses be your downfal
V. Pain
#34. You are the custodian of your own happiness. What other people say, do or think does not create a basis for your happiness. It is you who decides your own happiness, just like forgiveness.
Stephen Richards
#35. Before making a snap judgment, ask yourself if it really is something that has hurt you or simply just made you angry at yourself for allowing it to happen. It's amazing what 'sleeping on it' can do. A new day sees a new beginning.
Stephen Richards
#37. This pain you are avoiding is a very necessary pain that will make you strong again.
Stephen Richards
#38. The pain you feel is simply because you do not yet have the strength to forgive. But you will grow strong again, that is for sure.
Stephen Richards
#39. So, although my story is sometimes ugly, it's also beautiful.
Niki Krauss
#40. Coming to terms with incest is not easy. Learning to be a survivor, not a victim, gives new meaning to life
Lynette Gould
#41. An engaging examination of a painful subject, with a focus on healing and forgiveness. - Kirkus Review
Robert Uttaro
#42. You're too sensitive' victims of sexual abuse are told over and over by those whose reality depends on being insensitive. Most adults who have been in the victim role cringe when anyone tells them they are sensitive. In fact, sensitivity is a lovely trait and one to be cherished in any human being.
Renee Fredrickson
#43. A broken and mended relationship turns out to be stronger than one that has never been broken, almost like how bones can become even stronger once broken and then healed.
Stephen Richards
#45. We are not at the bargaining table in agreement to end abuse to our world. We are on the battlefield deciding everyday if we will let this world die or live, by how we contribute to its treatment.
Shannon L. Alder
#46. I can no longer stay quiet in this world, I have a voice and I feel it reverberate off my internal walls, making its slow climb upward until its melody can be heard all around.
Elin Stebbins Waldal
#47. Writing therapy is my form of healing. Try and detach yourself from painful memories by infusing characters and then stepping back.
Phil Wohl
#48. I am empowered by self-knowledge, by ownership of my experiences, and by all aspects of myself.
Maureen Brady
#49. Pray for all who have suffered shame, abuse, or neglect that leads them to despise themselves. May they experience this God in whom there is mercy, healing, and complete acceptance. PRAYER
Lisa E. Dahill
#50. It appears that DDNOS is the intentional goal of these abusers, but DID sometimes results from a failure of programming.
In DDNOS, the ANP is always present, even when another part is in control of the behavior and feelings.
Alison Miller
#52. Assuming you are still lost in thought about when exactly you should forgive someone, well the time is NOW.
Stephen Richards
#53. In the process of forgiveness, you can only control your own actions and decisions.
Stephen Richards
#54. There is comfort in knowing that you don't have to pretend anymore, that you are going to do everything within your power to heal.
Ellen Bass
#55. Do not allow yourself to be pulled into the role of embracing victimship as some sort of badge of honor to wear or flash around at any opportunity.
Stephen Richards
#56. The pain you have gone through will give you the strength of character to come through it all, so long as you learn from what you have suffered then it was not suffering at all.
Stephen Richards
#57. Healing from childhood abuse is not going mad, it is going sane.
Jan Hawkins
#58. I look upon the gift of my life as a wondrous journey.
Maureen Brady
#59. All people cross the line from childhood to adulthood with a secondhand opinion of who they are. Without any questioning, we take as truth whatever our parents and other influentials have said about us during our childhood, whether these messages are communicated verbally, physically, or silently.
Heyward Bruce Ewart III
#60. If I were free, as a physician, to say what I pleased, I would tell every abused person I see that there is an entire world out there that is nothing like the one you're living. Go discover it.
C. Kennedy
#61. When healing from abuse, taking care of your physical body is wise:
* Get sunshine daily
* Exercise regularly
* Eat a healthy diet
* Get enough sleep
* Go to the doctor when needed.
Caroline Abbott
#62. I am filled with truth at my center where I once held shame.
Maureen Brady
#63. Always know there are friends somewhere rooting for you. There are people you don't know, always praying for you and lifting you before God. - Jenee, from "To the Survivors".
Robert Uttaro
#64. This is a book which I would recommend to anyone who is walking through the pain of abuse. A book of courage in the face of overwhelming odds; a book which will touch your heart and give you hope.
Ruth Hawkey
#66. The only thing that will make us remain glued to being the victim is our failure to handle the emotions that we go through and the pain that overcomes us.
Stephen Richards
#67. Empowerment is something that happens throughout your healing, as courage and success in facing your memories build your self-esteem. Some of the strengths you get from taking on your buried memories does not show up in your life until long after the resolution has been achieved.
Renee Fredrickson
#68. The purpose of forgiveness is not to make sure that someone ends up changing into what you expect them to be, as this is dominance. The purpose is actually to make your own life better, more worthy and less stressful. Forgiveness reduces the hold that the wrongdoer has over you and empowers you.
Stephen Richards
#69. There's an innocence to her still that amazes me. Sometimes I forget she's older than me. Then, I remember that she hasn't gone through what I've gone through.
Zoe Cruz
#71. If there ever was someone who had a control over you, someone who could cause you the greatest pain, someone who could ignore your most necessary requirements and someone for whom forgiveness were truly difficult to render, that person is none other than YOU.
Stephen Richards
#72. The moment we see beyond our personal desires to be felt sympathy for, that is the time we can actually start the journey to that final destination of true forgiveness.
Stephen Richards
#73. If we studied the issue of forgiveness with a wider perspective, we are bound to opt for it after all.
Stephen Richards
#74. I spent many years trying to make up reasons about why I had the flashbacks, memories, continuous nightmares. When I finally decided to quit trying to hide from truth, I began to heal.
Karen Marshall
#76. Out of all the piles of dirt, garbage, and shit we have been handed, we can grow a patch of daisies.
Patti Feuereisen
#77. When you make up your mind to forgive, your happiness will almost automatically follow.
Stephen Richards
#78. All the resentment that lies in your heart is simply causing damage to you mostly.
Stephen Richards
#79. When you forgive, it does not mean that you have submitted, it simply means that you have made a choice to stop bearing any grudge.
Stephen Richards
#81. I value and honor the way that my suffering brings me to further search and surrender.
Maureen Brady
#82. As human beings, we are custom made to be happy. Why then would we want to change the order of things by not being happy?
Stephen Richards
#83. Blaming other people inevitably makes us blame ourselves because if we are pointing the finger at someone, practically, we are pointing it at ourselves as well.
Stephen Richards
#84. For change to occur in us, we must be willing to enter the wilderness of the unknown and to wander in unfamiliar territory, directionless and often in the darkness....We do not need to keep every little thing under control. In fact, we find ourselves only by allowing some falling apart to happen.
Maureen Brady
#85. Many survivors insist they're not courageous: 'If I were courageous I would have stopped the abuse.' 'If I were courageous, I wouldn't be scared'... Most of us have it mixed up. You don't start with courage and then face fear. You become courageous because you face your fear.
Laura Davis
#86. Some of the most effective segments are interviews with various staff members, including Aila, who works for the center's legal department. She explains the difficulties of rape prosecution, concluding that "only the survivor" can truly define justice. - Kirkus Review
Robert Uttaro
#87. Do the forgiveness and carry on going forward. Leave the worrying to the other person. Eat what is on your plate and leave the rest to them.
Stephen Richards
#88. As we move away from the old role in which we were helplessly entrapped as a victim, we make friends with the people who affirm us. Their enthusiasm about us mirrors the positive experience we are having.
Maureen Brady
#89. The minute we put aside our self-righteousness and move away from being the aggrieved, then we are on a healing process.
Stephen Richards
#90. The world is full of victims; don't add to the growing culture of "I've a story to tell", well not unless it's a story to help others overcome situations or as a warning.
Stephen Richards
#91. The practice of forgiving is a sequential practice that begins with excusing someone.
Stephen Richards
#92. You can't sweep something broken into a bag and call it whole. It takes repair.
Paula Heller Garland
#93. Forgiveness does carry with it numerous obstacles and one may well be surprised why many people find it a very difficult hurdle to jump over.
Stephen Richards
#94. The more we focus on who we are in Christ, the less it matters who we were in the past, or even what happened to us.
Joyce Meyer
#95. It is important to learn about being multiple, and what works for their healing, from your client. To work with the alters, rather than trying to get the ANP to control the rest of the personality system.
Alison Miller
#96. The idea of always wanting to be the victim in circumstances where you have been offended is a common human trait. Each person wants to be viewed as the aggrieved party.
Stephen Richards
#97. Work hard. Suit yourself, then you'll know at least one person is pleased.
Carole Estrup
#98. Distancing yourself from some painful event is probably the ignition for the process of forgiveness.
Stephen Richards
#99. Though our childhood abuse left us feeling someone ought to make reparation to us, if we wait a lifetime for that, we may never receive what we need. We choose instead to face the idea that from now on, we are going to take responsibility for caring for ourselves.
Maureen Brady
#100. When you forgive, you are freed from some of the feelings of disapproval and it can contribute to lessening your negative thoughts.
Stephen Richards
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